5 Reasons Wichita Couples Are Choosing The Barn at Grace Hill For Their Wedding Day

all photos in this post by Alex Bo Photo

Planning your dream wedding in Wichita can feel exciting, but also a little overwhelming. Between busy downtown venues, parking garages, limited outdoor space, and strict timelines, many couples find themselves searching for something more peaceful, more personal, and more them.

That’s why so many Wichita brides and grooms are looking beyond the city and discovering the charm of a countryside wedding, and they’re finding it just 25 minutes north of Wichita at The Barn at Grace Hill.

Our venue combines Kansas elegance with a relaxed, rural atmosphere that lets couples slow down, breathe, and truly savor their day. We’ve welcomed hundreds of Wichita couples, and again and again, they tell us the same thing: escaping the city made their wedding unforgettable and felt like such a treat to share with their guests.

Here are the top five reasons Wichita couples are choosing to say “I do” at The Barn at Grace Hill.

1. Scenic Views and Natural Backdrops

There’s nothing quite like the beauty of the Kansas countryside - open skies, rolling fields, and those golden sunsets that seem to go on forever.

At The Barn at Grace Hill, your wedding photos aren’t limited to a few city backdrops. Instead, you’ll have endless natural scenery, from golden-hour portraits in the fields to romantic moments under the rustic white barn beams. Wichita photographers love how the soft light and wide-open views create timeless images that feel effortlessly beautiful.

When you choose a countryside venue, the backdrop becomes part of your story, and every photo reflects the peace and joy of the day.

2. Privacy and Exclusivity

In the city, weddings often share space with other events, hotels, or even passing traffic. Out here, it’s just you.

Couples tell us one of their favorite parts of celebrating at The Barn at Grace Hill is the complete privacy. No noise, no interruptions, no distractions. Your wedding feels intimate and intentional, focused entirely on your love story.

Guests can relax, enjoy the scenery, and truly feel like they’re part of something special. From the first look to the final sparkler send-off, the day belongs entirely to you.

3. Flexible Indoor and Outdoor Spaces

Kansas weather has a mind of its own, but that doesn’t mean your plans have to change. One of the best things about a countryside barn venue is the flexibility to move seamlessly between indoor and outdoor settings.

The Barn at Grace Hill was designed with that in mind. Whether you envision an outdoor ceremony surrounded by open fields or a cozy indoor celebration beneath the chandeliers, we’ve got you covered. Many Wichita couples appreciate knowing that no matter the forecast, their day will be beautiful and stress-free.

4. A Peaceful Escape from the City Hustle

After months of planning, Wichita couples love being able to slow down and truly enjoy their day. Out here, the air feels a little fresher, the pace a little calmer, and the focus right where it should be - on you, your family, and your love.

Guests often describe countryside weddings as a “mini getaway” from city life. It’s a chance to disconnect, breathe in the Kansas breeze, and soak in every heartfelt moment. Brides often tell us how much they appreciated having time - time to connect, laugh, dance, and make memories that last.

5. All-in-One Venue Convenience

One of the biggest perks of a countryside venue is having everything in one place - ceremony, reception, photos, and preparation. At The Barn at Grace Hill, you don’t have to worry about coordinating multiple locations or managing complex logistics.

Our all-in-one layout includes beautiful getting-ready spaces, both indoor and outdoor ceremony options, a spacious reception area, and endless photo opportunities across the property. Nearby lodging and easy access from I-135 make it convenient for guests traveling from Wichita or other parts of Kansas.

Couples love that they can simply arrive, relax, and let the day unfold - all in one unforgettable location.

Plan Your Wichita Wedding in the Countryside

Escaping the city doesn’t mean giving up convenience. The Barn at Grace Hill offers the perfect blend of country charm and modern comfort, just a short, easy drive north of Wichita (and yes, there’s even a Starbucks 10 minutes away).

Once you exit the interstate in Newton, you’ll make just one turn before arriving at our long driveway, leading to a bright white barn surrounded by open skies and natural beauty.

There’s something about a barn wedding that brings everyone back to their roots - where laughter echoes through the beams, love feels simple and genuine, and the Kansas countryside reminds us what truly matters.

If you’re searching for a Wichita wedding venue that feels timeless, elegant, and unmistakably you, we’d love to show you around.

✨ Click Here to Schedule a tour at The Barn at Grace Hill and see for yourself why so many Wichita couples are choosing the countryside for their wedding day.

all photos in this post by Alex Bo Photo

A Weekday Wedding- Everything You Need to Know From a Monday Bride

We couldn’t be more thrilled to have one of our very own brides take over the blog today. Meet Allie Stephens. We wish you could really meet her, you’d love her instantly. I mean, just look at her, swinging around in that yellow chair! Allie, you are ADORABLE.

Allie and Garrett chose to have a Monday wedding! And we have found that so many of our couples (unless they happen to have been invited to a weekday wedding before) have no idea that couples DO sometimes choose weekdays for their wedding, for sooooo many different reasons. We have had so many fabulous weekday weddings that feel exactly like a weekend wedding does. When that day is here, no one even thinks about what day of the week it is.

If you’re considering a weekday wedding, reach out to us, we have a rate that is ONLY for Monday through Thursday weddings that will help you have your dream wedding and build your dream vendor team, with tons of savings!!

Here’s Allie as she tells you everything that went into their Monday wedding decision…

Weekday weddings are growing in popularity, but lots are wondering: who gets married on a weekday, anyway? I got married at The Barn at Grace Hill on Monday, 07/25/2022. As we started the wedding planning process, a weekday wedding was an easy decision for my husband and me. Even though a weekday was the best choice for me, I will admit it might not work for everyone. There are pros and cons, and many things to consider. As a weekday wedding bride, here is everything I think you need to know about weekday weddings.

Things to Consider:

Your Guests - Foremost, you need to consider your guests. Create your guest list and think about things like travel, work, and kids. How far will most of your guests be traveling? Will your farthest family and friends have enough travel days? Will they be able to take off work? Can families with kids miss school or find childcare during the week? You know your guests best; think about how a weekday wedding might work for them.

Wedding Size - Consider the ideal size of your wedding. If you want a large wedding, reconsider choosing a weekday. Weekdays are best for smaller weddings, as they may have fewer guests. If you are looking for a more intimate event with close family and friends, then a weekday might be a perfect fit. There are many positives to having a smaller wedding, including less stress, fewer costs, and more individual time to spend with your guests.

Wedding Vibe - Next, consider the vibe you are aiming for. Do you want an extravagant all-night party vibe or a quiet, more relaxed day? Weekday weddings usually start later in the day for people traveling and working. They also don’t go as late since people have to get home and work the next day. You can still have alcohol on a weekday if you wish; however, it is a perfect fit for those wanting a dry wedding.

The Day - Often, Friday is part of the weekend by venues and vendors. That leaves Monday - Thursday as options for a weekday wedding. We opted for Monday so that we could plan things for the weekend prior. Family members could travel on the weekend if needed, and we had extra time to spend with guests before the wedding day. Typically, it is easier for employees to take off at the beginning of the week than at the end of the week. I have heard from many other brides that Thursday is also a popular option.

The Pros:

Saving Money on the Venue - The savings are, of course, one of the biggest pros of a weekday wedding. Wedding venues typically offer much cheaper rates on the weekday compared to the weekend. Just to give you an idea, the basic weekend packages at The Barn at Grace Hill start at $5,500. While their basic weekday rates range from $1500-3000. In case you’re not good at quick math like me, that means you might save $2500-4000 on a venue just by picking a day during the week!

Saving Money on Vendors - Also, lots of wedding vendors, such as photographers, videographers, florists, and caterers, often offer discounts for weekday bookings. Additionally, many things cost less during the week, including flights, hotel rooms, and car rentals. If you have a small budget, this is a great way to save, and your savings can be huge!

Sooner Availability - Since weddings typically fall on the weekend, most venues and vendors book their weekends first. If you want sooner availability with your dream venue or favorite vendors, a weekday is a great way to book with those that are in high demand or already booked out for the year.

The Cons:

Not Everyone Will be There - It is important to set your expectations and understand that a weekday is not the most convenient for many guests. Just like with any wedding, don’t expect everyone to be there. If people can't make it, that’s okay. You don’t need to feel bad if someone can’t make it or if people aren’t happy with the date that you pick. Remember, the people who care about being there will make time for your day and will be there no matter what.

Not Everyone Will Like It - If you are a bride, you are probably already aware that people love to give unsolicited advice and opinions about weddings. Not everyone may understand or like that you are choosing a weekday. Some people may think it’s rude or inconvenient to plan an event during the week. Be prepared for a little backlash, but don’t forget, it’s your day and your decision.

Allie’s Advice:

Check With Important People  - Since a weekday wedding isn’t the norm, I would suggest making sure that everyone you want to be there can make it work. Send a few texts out and ask around to make sure your most important people can make it on a weekday. Check with your close family, friends, and wedding party.

Heads Up - Once you have picked a date, I would suggest giving your guests a heads-up as soon as possible. Most people will assume your wedding will land on a weekend, so letting everyone know will help them prepare. Make sure your most important people know so they can be sure to take off work or plan arrangements. I would also suggest specifically telling any older people that your wedding is in fact on a weekday, so they are not confused when they see that your date falls during the week.

Go For It - I loved getting married on a Monday. If I were to do it all again, I would not pick another day. The money we saved paid for our honeymoon. All the important people we wanted to share our day with made it work. We had a beautiful wedding that did not break the bank. We were able to book all the vendors that we loved. Our Monday wedding could not have been more perfect. If you have made it this far reading and are still leaning towards a weekday wedding, then my last piece of advice would be to go for it!

All Photos by Alex Bo Photo

15 Ideas for the Most Magical Christmas Wedding

It truly is the most wonderful time of the year! Grab a warm cup of cocoa, cuddle up with your favorite blanket and enjoy our collection of Christmas wedding ideas!  Christmas-themed weddings can take on several different looks.  Just like we decorate our houses for the holidays - some of us have pops of red and green all over, and some stay more neutral with gold, silver and greenery. Some of us decorate more traditionally and festive and some of us more elegantly and classy. The point is, there is some flexibility and you get to choose the vision that best fits the mood you’re aiming for.   If you keep the focus on making the event feel cozy and intimate, you can’t go wrong.

1. Colors - A classic Christmas-themed wedding color scheme could be a combination of deep reds and emerald green, but doesn’t have to be. For accent colors, consider neutrals like black, white, or even a soft gray or nude beige. Obviously red and green are the go-to holiday colors, but selecting deeper hues ups the elegance factor. Imagine emerald green table coverings with black dinner napkins and gold napkin rings.  And you can always go away from the red and green, and choose a dusty blue hue accented with blush, white, and sparkly silver - simply enchanting. 

2. Festive Stationery - Nothing sets the tone better than when your invited guests open up the invitation to your big day. Whether your invitation is full of winter greenery, twinkle lights, holly berries, or sparkles, it will give your guests a taste of all that’s to come.  And a little side note, getting married in December means your guests will have less weddings to have to pick and choose from, so you won’t be competing for their RSVP like you might other times of the year.

3. Pops of Buffalo Check and Plaid - The pattern that screams Christmas!!  Gift each of your bridesmaids with plaid pajamas to wear all together in the bridal suite.  Use a buffalo check blanket to wrap up together as an accessory for your outdoor photos. 

4. Stockings - Not every venue has a staircase, but we do!   You could line the entire staircase with stockings, which is a great way to bring in fabric or colors to pull your vision together. Put names on your stockings to honor family members or important people in your lives that are no longer here - a meaningful alternative for a memory table.  Or have the names of all the family members being joined together from both sides of your new families - parents, grandparents, siblings.   Or simply just put 2 stockings at the top center of the staircase with the new Mr. and Mrs’ names.   

5. Candlelight Ceremony - The intimate ambiance of candles adds a touch of magic, creating an atmosphere that feels sacred and enchanting. What a way to ensure that your wedding is not just witnessed, but felt by all in attendance.  Just make sure to talk through your ceremony start time with your photographer and coordinator to make sure all other logistics will work out.  A first look, with most photos all taken in the daylight is probably a must.

6. Christmas Canon in D by Trans-Siberian Orchestra - Is there anything else that needs to be said?  Just decide how and where can you use this song.

7. Christmas Tree Altar - The focal point of the entire day. Olivia and Grant’s flocked Christmas trees in these photos created the most stunning backdrop for both their photos, their ceremony and their head table.  Here at The Barn at Grace Hill we love how the same effort and expense can benefit both your ceremony and reception. 

8. Christmas Scents - So many of our Christmas memories are connected to scents.  So bring in the nostalgia and Christmas feelings by burning  frasier fir and cinnamon candles.  As the scents fill your reception space, guests may forever add your wedding day to their repertoire of Christmas memories.

9. Ornaments - We loved how Olivia and Grant asked their guests to sign an ornament and place it on their Christmas tree instead of signing a guest book.  Every year, when they decorate their tree, they’ll be able to pull out ornaments that remind them of all the people who surrounded them on their wedding day.  

You could also create an ornament with your names and wedding date and send every guest home with it as a favor.  You know, just like how people do coozies. Each ornament becomes a tangible symbol of the joyous occasion and it’s remembered annually when it comes from storage to be put on the tree. Your guests will forever create a connection between your love story and the magic of the holidays.

10. Holiday Drinks - Infusing your food and drink with Christmassy flavors like eggnog, cranberry, and peppermint can be a pleasant (but subtle!) way to bring a touch of the holiday spirit to what you’re serving.  And if you’re using someone like Emilime Designs to create drink menus that are aesthically pleasing, drinks like a candy cane martini or a white Christmas margarita are the most lovely drinks to sketch.

11. Pine Trees, Garlands and Stems - This decor is so easy to find during the holiday time and sets the tone like nothing else.  Let’s be real, as a venue, we watch a LOT of floral and greenery go in the trash at the end of the day.  But every time we see Christmas weddings that use long evergreen garlands, they are the most coveted item at the end of the night.  Who doesn’t want to go straight home and use some leftover greenery in their own homes?!?  You will find homes for all of it, and guests or family members will continue to enjoy a piece of your wedding day. 

12. Family Treat Table - One of the best ideas we’ve ever seen was a holiday treat table that was created for take-home treats. The couple asked many of their family members to make several dozen of their most loved Christmas treat.  From trays full of peanut butter and fudge, to decorated sugar cookies and gingersnaps, to toffee and peppermint bark, the treat table was pure Christmas magic.  Guests were provided with take-home treat boxes and could fill their box to their heart’s content.  Like a candy-bar, but Christmas goodies!  Or like a cookie exchange, but your guests didn’t have to bring anything!  It’s your thank you gift.  What a unique and special way of including family recipes and all your favorite seasonal treats, and sharing them with your guests as a party favor. 

13. Gingerbread House - Instead of a traditional cake - think gingerbread house.  Not necessarily a colorful, candy-filled gingerbread house, but more of a classic look, white icing and intricate white details.  Take it to the next level and display a multi tiered gingerbread castle for that festive feel. 

14. Candlelight Exit - There can never be enough candles at Christmas.  Exit your ceremony or reception lined with your guests holding candles, just like the ones given out at Christmas Eve services.   The warm glow, the smiling faces and the joy filling every heart will be what sends you off as husband and wife. Not to mention the candlelight will give you the most beautiful photos. 

15. Sleigh Ride Departure -  End your celebration with a touch of holiday romance by opting for a grand exit that screams the season.  The joy on your guests’ faces as they witness you departing in a beautifully adorned sleigh or a charming horse-drawn carriage (because snow for a sleigh can’t be guaranteed in every location!) will be the culmination to the entire day that will never leave your heart. 

As you plan your Christmas wedding, don’t lose sight of all that makes this season so special and use that to drive all of your details.  Remember that the true magic lies in the personal touches, the shared moments, and the warmth exchanged. May your Christmas wedding be a beautiful mix of joy, love, and a celebration that sparkles with the spirit and true meaning of the season. 

All photos by Alex Bo Photo

That Time It Snowed - A Winter Wedding Dream

It was a literal winter wedding dream come true. The Wichita area hasn’t seen this amount of snow in 10+ years and Saturday, November, 25, Marissa and Mason were gifted with the most beautiful snow we have ever seen. This is what winter wedding dreams are made of.

We always try to encourage our couples to not plan around weather in Kansas. Just when you think you’ve selected a date that weather “should be mild”, Kansas gifts you with something unpredictable. We’d venture to guess Marissa and Mason wouldn’t have expected snow like this at the end of November. And yet, they rolled with the punches and the snow didn’t keep their guests from showing up! I mean, who doesn’t want to celebrate a love story in the middle of a magical winter wonderland. This day screamed romance and coziness like no other.

“Our day was so special, it was a perfect snowy day. Mason and I had a very unique day compared to a lot of couples. We were able to get the prettiest snow pictures, which is something we will be able to share with our kids and grandkids. We loved being surrounded by our closest family and friends and being able to take in the beautiful flakes falling outside! The day was chilly but we were able to find warmth in one another. It was everything we have ever dreamed of and more.” — Marissa

When Jordan Lyndsey Photography sent us peaks from this day, our jaws literally fell open. Enjoy.

From a venue standpoint, a constant falling snow for most of the day, just meant constant snow removal. Thankfully we are a family-owned business, and live right on property, allowing my husband and boys to remove snow for a few hours, come in and warm up, and repeat, all. day. long. By the end of the day, they were digging vendor and guests’ cars out of the snow, clearing the snow off them and sending them on their way.

They say the majority of weddings occur May through October here in Kansas. And we’ve seen that to be true. So we know those winter months aren’t typically the first that come to mind. This time of year generally is full of holiday celebrations, food and family time - not necessarily wedding dates. But those are the things that make this season feel warm, celebratory and joyful - and all the more reason to get married in the holiday season!!! We have always felt like weddings between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day have a different vibe about them. Like if you took your favorite holiday movie + twinkling lights + a warm cup of your favorite winter drink + the coziest blanket + your favorite people + that joyful holiday spirit and combine them all together - that’s the feel you get on a winter wedding day.

For December couples, the chance to celebrate your wedding anniversary during the holidays makes the whole feeling of the season that much more special. Plus, with the extra days off around the holidays, it's the perfect month for planning anniversary getaways—sun and sand, snow and slopes, you've got options. And let’s be real, having an anniversary in the winter, means that that beach vacation will make for an even better get away than any other time of the year!!!

We know that the snow can’t be guaranteed. But the warm and cozy, joyful vibes can be. Marissa and Mason’s winter wedding will go down as one of our favorite memories.

All photo credit for this post goes to Jordan Lyndsey Photography

The Ultimate Guide to a Stress-Free Wedding

all photos on this post by West Rose Photo & Film

Here we are, over 5 years from the start.  As in, 5 years ago, there was no big white barn.  Only a county approval to build.  It was only a field. And now, we’ve done over 300 weddings.  God is just so incredibly good and gracious. 

We could share a million things we’ve learned and seen.  Gosh, we could tell you ALL the stories - the good, the bad, the ugly. But mostly beautiful.  But over the years of wedding experience we’ve gained, we have come to land in a place that we are most passionate about.  And that is, how your wedding day (and even the planning process) goes.  Our entire team would tell you that the days that our hearts break the most are the days we see stress swell up and overcome a bride, a groom, or their parents.  

One of the greatest desires we have for your wedding day is that you can be fully in the moment with the love of your life and all your people, that you’d be able to focus on the faces in front of you, the emotions you’re feeling, and the meaning behind all of it.  And not have to worry one bit about the logistics of the event itself.  

So if we were going to spend our time telling you anything about how the last 5 years has gone, we want to spend it sharing everything we can to help you have a completely stress-free wedding day.  

Because outside of the most beautiful, God-honoring covenant between 2 people that happens on this side of heaven, a stress-free wedding day is at the top of our list for you. 

So this is for you sweet bride…

15 things to help ensure your wedding day is NOT defined by stress. 

1. Determine your natural strengths and weaknesses.  And be realistic about what planning an event actually means and what else you have going on in your life right now.  Truthfully, this may be the largest event in your life that you’ll ever plan.  And while you may go on to be an event planner, chances are you’ll never plan another event in your lifetime outside of a small birthday party for 12 people.  So think about what you’re capable of and what you’re not.   Are you naturally an organized person? Are you good with details? Do you like taking on large projects, communicating details, and delegating tasks? If so,  then your wedding planning experience is going to be totally different than someone who hates details, couldn’t even keep an organized binder for anything in highschool, and who are paralyzed by deadlines.  We’ve met several brides who have said “I don’t really care about anything, and am struggling to dive into all the crazy details, because all I really care about is marrying my guy, and that’s all I want!”   Guess what?  These brides needed to call in the troops!  They needed help to accomplish the event details, and when they had the support they needed, they had no problem getting lost in their dreams of just being married to their man.  Growing up, every little girl dreams of their wedding day, but never considers what all goes into it.  If you struggle to handle stress and anxiety, that’s ok, you are not alone! Give yourself grace, because you know you are built for plenty of other things besides event planning. There are professionals for that. Don’t be discouraged when a friend is loving wedding planning and you are completely overwhelmed.  Be confident in who you are and what you can and can’t do. Be okay with getting help in the areas you were not made for.  Keep reading, because we have so much more on this topic, regarding your vendor team!

2. Stay focused on what is most important to you and your fiance.  This means both the big picture and the little picture.  The big picture is your MARRIAGE!!!  Don’t get lost in how beautiful you want your wedding to be, that you lose focus of how beautiful you want your marriage to be.  Spend time talking about what foundational pieces of this celebration and the days after, are most important to you.  Then leave some time to decide what “little picture” things are most important too.  Is the food that you serve at dinner hugely important to you?  Is a room full of fresh flowers non-negotiable?  Is inviting everyone you’ve ever known a big deal to you?  Spend time talking about what will bring you the most joy.  Let go of other people’s expectations and traditions and keep a good perspective.  When you know the things that are most important to you, you’ll be able to let go of things that you don’t really care about.  The load that will be lifted could be huge. 

3. Do we dare suggest that you delegate and dial-back on the DIY?  EEEK!  Don’t shoot!!  We know, we know, saving a buck here and there can be helpful. But with all the weddings we get to witness, we see a huge pattern - couples and their families do not consider how valuable their time and sanity are.  One of our favorite examples of this is regarding linens.  We’ve had a few weddings that have chosen to bring in their own linens, rather than renting them.  They have either purchased them online (because sure, you can probably find them cheaper than renting them), or bought from another bride who was done with them.  But what isn’t factored in is the time and effort to get these linens table-ready.  When ordering new, your linens come folded up many times into small squares that have to be steamed/ironed before being ready for tables.  One time we had a mother-of-the-bride tell us that it took them 23 hours total (the week of the wedding) to steam all of their linens.  They hardly had room at their house for the job, and then had the hardest time trying to transport them and have them not be messed up. They had so many other things they needed to be doing and they were consumed with something they hadn’t planned on.  No one has ever been glad they handled their own linens.  There are rental companies for that, and we’d highly suggest never taking on this tedious and exhausting task yourself.  There are so many things that could fall into this category.  Your time is valuable. Your sanity is important. If your budget won’t allow for additional paid help, call in your most useful family and friends to help you complete your projects. But don’t miss that word “useful”. Make sure you pick the ones that are known to be efficient/handy/the get-things-done type. 

4. Celebrate all along the planning journey!!!!  Make a big deal out of the big planning steps - venue choice, cake and food tasting.  YOU FOUND YOUR VENUE - go out to dinner and celebrate!!!  INVITATIONS ARE SENT - relax and unwind with pizza and a movie at home!   Stop and find the joy and don’t get lost in just checking something off your list!  You are planning one of the most memorable and joy-filled events of your life - soak it in, enjoy and celebrate!

5. Take breaks. We promise it does not take 365-500 days to plan a wedding.  We have seen weddings planned in 90 days and less - and they were perfect and beautiful, and instead of having to discuss details for all of those days - it was just pushed into a smaller time frame, meaning all together, less brain space and time in your lives spent consumed by wedding planning.  Be intentional, and take days and even weeks off at a time where you just enjoy being engaged and don’t bog your friends and family down with wedding details non-stop.  Your brain needs a rest.  Remember, the wedding is over in a day, your marriage continues forever.  Go for a date night and talk only about your relationship and nothing about your wedding.  Let those helping you know that you’re taking a week off - nothing needs to be decided or talked about. 

6. Build a vendor team that your heart connects with.  It’s hugely beneficial to you when they have the same vision for your day, and that you feel supported and cared for, and that you trust them. This is especially important with those vendors who are on-site all day with you, interacting with you, your family and other vendors.  Believe us, vendors put off vibes of their own, and while we’d love to say they are always professional and have a heart to serve you, we’d be lying if we did.  A photographer that has a take-charge personality to keep all the people lined up and ready for photos, and who is also gracious and kind, will set a tone that is completely different than one who is screaming at your family, who can’t smile and everyone is miserable during photos.  The Wichita vendor community is full of so many amazing wedding vendors, and we offer all of our couples a list of the ones that we have experienced the most often and can justify that they will greatly enhance a wedding day. Choose vendors that are professional, organized, and have proven they do great work. This is going to take some up front work because you’ll need to read reviews and talk to anyone you know that has utilized their services.  But the up-front work you put in will pay off hugely when the day comes.

7. Lean on your wedding venue.  Venues do this all the time and are a huge source of knowledge.  They can tell you what has worked well and what hasn’t.  They will often catch problems before they arise.  They can answer your questions, support you in the layout of the space, and so much more.  At our venue, we have set up systems and processes that are for the pure sake of relieving our couples of the stress of unknowns.  When details are covered and communicated, everyone can relax so much more.  We want to be the least stressful part of your wedding planning journey, and honestly, want to be your rock. We’ve even been known to have a few encouraging pep-talks to some very weary brides, and the conversation ended in a complete 180 from where it started! It brings us no greater joy than to know that something we were able to help with lifted a burden off of our couples.

8. Don’t sweat the small stuff.  The seating chart that you had to change 43 times in the days before the wedding, and the broken bustle that had to be safety-pinned up, will never matter in the end.  And don’t even let the weather be a big thing.  Meaning, if you live in the Midwest, don’t depend on the outdoors.  Plan for indoors, and if you’re pleasantly surprised by the one, perfect day of the year we get here in Kansas, then get yourself a lottery ticket, because you won the jackpot.  There will be so many small things that come up along the way.  Don’t give them weight.  Remember, if you’ve already determined what is most important about your day - these small things won’t matter one bit.  Practice asking yourself (or reminding each other) - is this little or big?  How much of our energy needs to be spent on this?  The little stuff will never matter in the end.

9. Calculate a realistic budget and do NOT blow it.  Money has the potential to be one of the most stressful parts of this entire journey.  But you will soon learn, if you haven’t already, that having a budget and sticking to it, in life (not just for a wedding) will save you so much stress.  Stress increases when the budget is blown.  Any American household, who manages their money well, knows that when the “eating out” budget is gone - there is no more eating out.  Blowing the budget means you are potentially spending money that doesn’t even exist.  Don’t do this.  Maybe this means, you need to keep a spreadsheet of expenses - if you miss a $7 expense here and there, don’t worry.  But track all your main expenses. And remember, if you need to cut costs, if you know what parts of your day are most important to you, you’re going to find it much easier to let go of other parts. 

10. Put your wedding day in the hands of a Day-of Coordinator.  This advice is gold and probably the advice we give the most.  The thing about the wedding day is that you may not realize all the behind-the-scenes details, questions and issues that come up.  The DJ needs  a different spot due to power issues - “no worries”, says your trusted person. “I got this”.  It’s raining, we’ve gotta move your ceremony inside. “Of course,” says your trusted person.  The cake is an hour late from the agreed upon delivery time.  “I’ll make that call and figure out what’s going on”, says your trusted person.  No one can find the champagne flutes and cutting tools for the cake cutting.  “Let me find that for you”, says your person.  If you don’t have this person, then typically it falls on the bride or her mom.  The day we decided to add a dedicated day-of coordination service, was the day that one our mothers-of-the-bride, was in tears, hiding in the kitchen, because she hadn’t been able to enjoy any part of the day because she was trying to handle all of the moving parts. Do not let this be your mother. Delegating tasks to others is a sure-fire way to stay stress-free.  And maybe it’s a wedding planner that you need!  If you’ve been struggling with planning from the start or don’t have a lot of time to dedicate to planning at all, then a wedding planner may be your ticket to low-stress. This extra support from a third party can make a huge difference when it comes to stress and anxiety.

11. Have a detailed wedding day timeline and have someone that is following it. See above - your Day-of Coordinator!!   There’s a balance between being slave to a fixed timeline and being organized so you get everything in that you want.  You can’t leave this to chance.  A good photographer will help you build part of all of your timeline, they’re the ones that know how long your photos will take anyway!  A good hair and makeup vendor will help you know exactly how much time needs to be planned from start to finish.  One of the resources we give to our couples is an example timeline of a typicaly wedding day. After witnessing over 300 weddings, we have seen and felt what a good flow to the day is.  We have experienced receptions that go way too long and there is no energy or people left, and, and we’ve experienced receptions that are way too short.  Our tried and true “example timeline” has helped many of our couples have a place to start when building their day. If it’s on the timeline - it’s going to happen.  So create it, build in a cushion for flexibility, and hand it to someone that will make sure things happen as you planned. 

12. Stress often comes with the obsessed.  Stop looking at Pinterest.  Tell yourself what you have planned is enough.  Our world is full of wedding inspiration left and right. And if your social media feed will not stop putting it in front of you, stop clicking on it.  There are a million different ways to style your tables and design your seating chart.  And there will always be another type flower that you come across that must be added to your bouquet. You will never be able to fit in every photo opp you’ve ever seen.  Reason #145 to stay focused on what matters to you the most, and don’t get overwhelmed and obsessed with the millions of other weddings out there.  This one is yours, which makes it the most important one, and doesn’t need to be like anyone else’s. 

13. Give up perfect.  Your day is perfect if you are married to your best friend at the end.  Plan for something unexpected to happen.  Tell yourself in advance that you will not freak out.  If you know something will happen, and you have the right people delegated to handle it, you may not even ever find out about what went wrong.  It may be a big thing and it may be a small thing - but whatever it is, can you determine in advance how you will react?  Your guests, your wedding party, your family and your fiance will be more impressed by how you handle the details of your day, than what the actual details of the day were.  Perfection won’t be a part of your life, your marriage or any day from this day forward - so why put unrealistic expectations on this day?

14. Follow a planning timeline.  You know, one of those guides that tells you what you need to do 12 months out, 9 months out, 2 weeks out, and the day before!  While those lists aren’t specific to you and your details, they will get you very close.  We offer a planning guide to all of our couples!  If time management isn’t your strength and you tend to ignore deadlines, delegate a trusted person in your life to touch base with monthly (then maybe more often as it gets closer) to keep you on track and remind you what needs to be done now.   And no matter what that timeline says, rework it so you can be done 2 weeks before the wedding.  There is no sense at all in procrastinating and causing unneeded stress in your final weeks.  And lastly, set a HARD “clock-out” time 24-48 hours before the wedding.  Relish in the work you’ve done, trust your people and focus on your fiance and what this day is going to mean. 

15. Unplug and reconnect with your fiance. Pray about your day and ask others to cover you in prayer too. We have stories at our venue of events and details that were complete answers to prayer, whether it was because our team was praying, the family was praying or the bride and groom.  And more than likely, there are countless other stories that we don’t even know about that are a testimony to God’s goodness and faithfulness in hearing our prayers.  Pray for calm hearts, no family drama, safety to those coming and going, pray that food doesn’t run out, and that the flower girl will actually make it down the aisle. Pray that you will be able to soak up little moments that could be missed.  And while this is a day that has logistics about it, like any other large event, (some that may be stressful) pray that your minds and hearts will be able to stay focused on what truly matters, and that your planning journey, and your wedding day are defined by JOY and not stress. 

Wishing you a BLESSED and STRESS FREE wedding day and planning journey! 

All photo credit for this post goes to West Rose Photo & Film